Is that you baby?

I'm having my first Third Trimester ultrasound later today, and I'm hoping it will settle my nerves a little. The baby was in the 12th percentile range for growth at the last ultrasound. Between my weight loss, my inability to eat regularly, and my medications, there's a lot working against this little keiki right now. At my last OB appointment (I go to a separate facility for the important ultrasounds), the doctor said my uterus measurements had caught up, so the baby was probably growing just fine now. He still wanted this follow-up scan done before he sees me next though.

One of my secret worries is that the baby doesn't move enough, and is that a bad sign? Whenever I wonder this, I immediately remind myself how difficult it's been for me to even tell when the baby is kicking, and just to shut up and relax.

Because there is a whole bunch of activity inside me that I don't know how to categorize properly any more. It was frustrating enough when I stopped being able to differentiate between hunger and nausea and fullness and heartburn. Now there are pains, jerks, spasms, stretching. I frequently get these episodes that feel like repetitive muscle spasms low in my intestines. Can that be the baby? Really? All the way down there? Or is it gas?

Everyone's heard of the age-old pregnancy complaint of the baby sitting, or occasionally dancing/jumping, on mommy's bladder - hence the frequent urination. Well, not once has anyone ever described that as a painful sensation. Yet during an outing in December, it felt like the baby was spending hours on end standing straight up and down, feet on my bladder, arms out for bracing, and then using all her might to push down. It felt like she was slowly but surely trying to "pop" my bladder, and it was definitely a painful sensation.

Similarly, but without the pain, are her "stretches". These feel like she's waking up from her fetal position, and slowly trying to sit up straight, pushing her back against the wall of my uterus. It's uncomfortable, but not painful. Although once or twice I became slightly alarmed at just how far she was pushing and would my uterus continue to stretch like that.

Yes, there have been kicks/punches. Definite jabs caused by baby. Whew! Such a relief to have a clear sign! Two friends recently mentioned the baby "rolling". Now what on earth is that going to feel like?!

Then there is what happened this morning. It felt like I had a six-limbed, uber-strong, super excited baby in there throwing a crazy temper tantrum. Seriously keiki, how can you possibly kick me there and there and there all at the same time??? And couldn't she tell that mommy was really nauseated before she even started?

I have to say, I am not happy with her tendency to stomp on my bladder and kick at my belly while I'm trying desperately to keep from vomiting up that day's hard-won nutrients.

Still, whatever it happens to be at the time, whenever there is any movement down there, I am very happy to know that it means she's in there and doing ok.